Wednesday, July 6, 2011


I still haven't made the call to my RE and I keep putting it off.  I'm sure they will call me when the results from the last tests are in anyway, but at our last conversation they expected that I'd be starting bc in mid-July.   I'm thinking more and more that I want to take a little time off - maybe delay the start of the meds until mid-August.  I'm just not sure that I'm ready to jump back in, but then I hear the voice telling me I shouldn't waste any more time.  I don't know what to do.  The thought of the hormones, the needles, the blood tests, the ultrasounds, the procedures, and then the inevitable unhappy ending -- ugh.  Should I continue if I don't have any hope?  I have to get my mind in the right place - but I don't really know how. 
I have a feeling that a co-worker is going through fertility treatments.  I'd never directly ask, but the mysterious appointments, moodiness, lack of attention to the job -- I like to think I recognize the signs.  If that is the case, I do hope it works out for her - but if it does work out for her, I don't really know how I'll react.