It's on.

I'm baaack... I wish I could say that I dropped ten pounds, had an amazing summer full of adventure, and am full of sunshine and roses just in time for IVF#2 but that's not particularly the case.  We are on track for try #2 and I did my first Lu.pron shot this morning.  Like riding a bike.....  I've been on bcp since early August and I'm sick of them....the type they give me throw me into a giant pit of despair for some reason.   I told myself I could handle it and it was temporary but it was tough.   Because we're timing this cycle around some Labor Day travel, I had to stay on the pills for a longer stretch.  Four more days to go, thank goodness.

I'm not feeling particularly positive, but I'm trying to figure out what I can do differently to make this cycle work -- thinking of circle+bloom - any thoughts on if it's worth it?  I'm stocked on raspberry leaf tea and caffeine is at a minimum - soon to be stopped entirely.   My mind is still in a funny place -- I'm accepting that it's time to start again, "back to school" if you will -- but I would be shocked if we get a baby at the end of this.  I'm just assuming we'll have the same end, take a break around the holidays and then MAYBE do another cycle in January.   It's like infertility and shots and clinic visits are my normal -- I don't know what is beyond that?   But I do know that one way or another I can't live my life like this forever.  We need to move on in one direction  or another.  The trouble is I'm not sure which one.

So that's where I'm at -- starting again, trying to stay hopeful and dealing with whatever comes along....