Friday, May 27, 2011

It's out of my hands

Transfer yesterday - two on board - an 8 cell and a 4 cell.  Three had already stopped developing, and they'll watch the other three to see if they'll freeze, but the doctor didn't seem very optimistic.  The procedure itself was absolutely fine - the word "textbook" was thrown around more than once.   The doctor and the ultrasound tech kept talking about how flawless it was, and how they wish all procedures could be like that.  That gave me hope.  But of course, looking on the interwebs for success rates and cell #s has me kind of depressed already.  No more Dr. Google for me.   We also learned that my left ovary just won't be reachable for any future IVF attempts because of it's position in relation to some veins, so it's all up to righty.  Of course, I'm hoping with every fiber of my being that this is our time and we won't need to do another IVF.    I just feel so helpless right now.  As the Dr. said, we've done everything that we can at this point and what will be will be -- of course, I take that to mean that it's all on me now.   If this fails, it will be because of my body.  I know it's been my problems all along, but this process makes it hit home a little more. 
I've already decided not to POAS this cycle.  I'm going to do my best to wait it out.  June 7th can't get here fast enough!

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