Time is slowly passing - one more week until beta day. I'm still sticking to my decision not to test at home. It's funny, the first few days I swore that it had worked and things were happening. Yesterday and today -- not so much. I can't sort out my symptoms. Could be PMS, could be crinone, could be implantation.... I just don't have any trust in my body anymore. I have found myself having more conversations with my husband about an actual future with a baby/babies. After our first loss, we were both so cautious. But I think seeing every step of the process the way you do with IVF can't help but bring hope. I know that plenty of women don't have success on the first try, but I would be happy if we were part of the lucky group that does. (Nice of me to state the obvious, eh?)
No word yet on our remaining embryos - I'll have to call today to see if any of them made it to freeze. I'll be surprised if they did - it didn't sound promising.
What I *really* need to do soon is improve my focus at work. I've been so distracted lately (the last year and a half, but who's counting...) and I my work is suffering. Maybe not so much that others can notice, but I notice and I hate not feeling as on top of things.
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